Spamcommentology, Part V: Porn (You Knew It Was Coming*)

So this week we’ve arrived at the climax** of my Spamcommentology series, with a very common sort of spam comment. I would ask the reader to take a wild guess what this category is, but since I already bared it all in the title, I’ll just get right down to it! (Incidentally, this kind of spam always includes links, but I’ve taking the liberty of stripping said links from the screen shots.)

So … you’re saying you have porn, then?
My Little Pony?!
That’s not how you spell “fantasy”.

The astute reader will note that even though, as I mentioned, this is an extremely common type of spam, I only included a couple of examples of it. This is because, much like porn itself, all the porn spam is pretty much the same; if you’ve seen one, you’ve seen them all.

For some reason, note that such spam very frequently turns up on the “About” page for Tucker over on Dennis’s blog. Why? I have no idea. It’s not like with the “gest revyoo of marley and me” where the title is recognizably that of a popular book and movie; and all the other animals have “Angel” pages, but they don’t get nearly as much porn spam as Tucker’s page does. If it were spam about food, then sure, I could see that being all over Tucker’s page, but “food spam” is not really a thing, ham in a can excepted (for a certain definition of “food”).

Now of course, there are many more minor categories of spam than the ones I’ve presented here, including spam in foreign languages (Russian is, perhaps not surprisingly, a popular one) that I never bother to translate. Well, all right, because you asked nicely, I’ll translate one for you, just this once.

This ….. is not what I was expecting.

There’s spam about financial trading, spam about clothes and fashion, spam about jewelry, spam about military conflicts. You name it, there’s spam about it, which brings us back to porn―specifically, Rule 34 of the Internet:

And that would explain why we saw “My Little Pony” in porn spam comment #2.

* No pun intended
** Pun intended

5 thoughts on “Spamcommentology, Part V: Porn (You Knew It Was Coming*)

  1. I’m surprised you didn’t mention the “family porn” in your first example. Does that have something to do with videos of parents bathing their children? I shudder to think of what else might be in that category. Thanks for translating the Russian example. I too have been curious but never plopped any of them into Google Translate for fear of what I might find. I do find my spam comments about as entertaining as you do and always glance through them before just deleting them.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I actually didn’t even notice it! 😮 I was looking for the spam comment that seemed to say the word “porn” the most times and skated over the other words in the comment. If I had spotted it I probably would have selected a different one. (I did, of course, notice the “My Little Pony” in the other comment, which was why I used it, because I wanted to work Rule 34 into the post …)

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Yes, I get way too much of that kind of junk, too. Its almost always in older posts, maybe they are trying to hide themselves?? LOL!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. “My little pony porn pics”? I can’t be the only curious about that.

    I’d agree with Rule 34. But I still can’t see how “cartoon porn” or animated ponies get peoples’ rocks off. Clearly I’m not experimental enough.

    Liked by 1 person

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