AI Yai Yai

So if you use WordPress (which I of course do), you may have noticed a new “AI Assistant” section when creating a post. At the time of this writing (June 29th, 2024), the options available in this feature are as shown below:

The AI tools available are:

• Optimize Publishing: “Use AI to optimize key details of your post.” I’m not sure why it says “key details” when the only thing it can do is improve your title (and I use the term “improve” loosely), but maybe there are additional things it can do that have not yet been revealed.
• AI Feedback On Post: “Get suggestions on how to enhance your post to better engage your audience.
• AI Featured Image: “Create and use an AI generated featured image for your post.”

What could possibly go wrong?

Now, this isn’t the sort of feature I would actually use, because the whole reason I’m here posting is because I like writing, even if I’m kind of on involuntary hiatus from writing books for now. But that doesn’t mean I’m not going to click on these things to see what sort of stuff they come up with. The answers to that question range from “completely inappropriate” to “ha ha ha ha ha” to “nightmare fuel”. Let’s look at a couple of examples from animals’ blog.

Exhibit A: Surely You Didn’t Want To Call Your Post That

The first time I noticed these new options was when I was doing a post where our smol black cat Oona was teaching a course in how to defend oneself from our much larger cat, Chaplin. I clicked on the “Optimize Post Title” to see what great ideas the AI might have in this area. Hang on to your hats, folks.

• Ninja Techniques for Handling Chaplin: Lessons with Oona
  This title highlights the ninja techniques for handling a big cat named Chaplin, attracting readers interested in pet training and entertainment
  
• Surprise Ninja Strike: Oona’s Lesson with Chaplin
  This title emphasizes the surprising ninja strike and the entertaining interaction with a big British cat, appealing to those seeking humorous pet content.
  
• Oona’s Rule #1: Mastering Ninja Skills with Chaplin
  This title focuses on Oona’s ninja rule #1 and the demonstration with a big English cat, targeting individuals interested in pet behavior and training tips.

The actual title of this post was “Demoonastration“. The suggested titles are … A little wordier? And at least one of them gives away the punch line. But hey, we do seek to appeal to those seeking humorous pet content. Also—and I can’t emphasize this enough—none of this is useful as pet behavior or training tips.

Exhibit B: Dogs Are A Horse Of Course Of Course

A few days later, I was putting together a Throwback Thursday featuring Tucker and Trixie, so I said to myself, “Self, what kind of picture would the AI generate as a featured image for this post?” You might think that, since the post is about a vizsla and a chow/shepherd mix, the AI would generate something dog-related.

You would be wrong.

Exhibit C: Mmm, Cheerios

A bit later, I had a post where Chaplin (disguised as the alleged English cat mentioned previously) tried to drop out of Oona’s class because she kept using him for demoonastrations, an attempt which was thwarted by the Professor from Gilligan’s Island, because why wouldn’t it be? And this time I exercise all three of the AI assistants, because I didn’t want any of them to feel left out. First up, we have the title optimization:

• Defending Oneself from Chaplin: The Third Method Revealed
  Highlights the topic of defending oneself from Chaplin and reveals the third method, intriguing readers and improving searchability for those interested in Chaplin-related content.
  
• Humorous Interactions: Dropouts and Cheerios
  Captures the humor and dialogue around dropping out of the class and references to Cheerios, attracting readers with a taste for light-hearted content and improving search visibility for related topics.
  
• The Professor’s Authority: English Cat’s Failed Attempt
  Sheds light on the English cat’s failed attempt to drop the class and the Professor’s authoritative decision, drawing attention to the characters and their interactions while enhancing search presence for related keywords.

I feel like these search terms would attract people looking for a different Chaplin. And as for dropouts and Cheerios, well, I mean, dropouts are free to eat whatever cereal they like, but I hear the honey nut variety is better.

Next up, we have the AI assistant’s feedback on the post:

The post content is engaging and humorous, with an interesting exchange betweeh the characters. The dialogue keeps the reader’s attention and adds depth to the scene. To further enhance the post, consider providing more context or background information about the characters for new readers. Additionally, incorporating visual elements such as images or illustrations to complement the dialogue can create a more immersive experience for the audience. Lastly, ensuring a consistent tone throughout the dialogue will help maintain the flow of the story.

Really. Incorporate images you say. 🤔

Finally, we have the AI-generated featured image. I hope everyone is sitting down.

You know how they say that, if you died unexpectedly at home and your cats were left without food, they might eventually decide to eat you? I have the feeling that these cats wouldn’t wait that long to get started. In fact, they might not even wait until you were dead. Especially the two wearing bow ties. In fact I’m pretty sure the one in the top hat is about to pull a knife out of that newspaper.

Incidentally, when I was finished with this post, it occurred to me that it might be interesting to see what the AI assistants had to say about it. Showing AI assistant suggestions about a post about AI assistant suggestions! So meta again.

Optimize Publishing:

• AI Assistant Tools for Optimizing Your Post Content
  This title highlights the AI assistant tools and their function in optimizing post content, attracting users interested in enhancing their posts and improving search visibility for related keywords.
  
• Engage Your Audience with AI Feedback and Featured Images
  Emphasizes the AI feedback on post engagement and the AI-generated featured images, appealing to users seeking to enhance audience engagement, and improving searchability for related topics.
  
• Humorous Examples of AI Post Optimization and Generated Images
  Showcases humorous instances of AI post optimization and image generation, attracting users interested in entertaining AI outcomes and improving visibility for related humorous content.

AI Feedback on Post:

The content provides a detailed and humorous account of the user’s experience with AI assistant tools for creating and enhancing posts. The author effectively conveys the limitations and unexpected outcomes of using AI for post optimization and image generation. Some actions to consider for improvement are:

1. Experiment with different post types and topics to explore a wider range of AI suggestions.

2. Consider incorporating the AI-generated suggestions into future posts for comparison and entertainment value.

3. Engage with the AI tools to explore potential benefits and limitations, offering readers a comprehensive review of their functionality.

AI Featured Image:

Are you sitting down? Seriously. I mean it this time.

Well unfortunately, that now that you’ve looked at that picture, you have one week to make sure at least twenty other people read this blog post; otherwise whatever that thing is in the bottom corner of the tablet is going to crawl out of your screen and get you.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HCnAMZriZ4M

My bad. Sorry about that.