The Early Years: Mmm, Potato

So a while back, I pulled some old Villains & Vigilantes (I think) character sheets, which people seemed to find amusing, so I figured I would dip back into the stack and pull out another one. Since I ran the game, most of the sheets in this stacks are going to be NPCs, and of them, most are going to be villains, because, after all, you gotta have villains to go with your vigilantes. Here’s today’s:

That’s no ordinary potato.

Yes, that’s right, what we’ve got here is a “Renegade Vegetable Villain”, an expert in, among other things, engineering, electronics, physics, chemistry, and … potato biology. Because of course he is. He could probably give these guys a run for their money:

Being a potato, Professor Potato has, as you might imagine, 360-degree vision, since, you know, he’s got eyes everywhere.

He’s also got tentacles that he can extend up to 2″, because apparently he’s been left in the drawer for too long and has started to sprout. Now, I know that two inches doesn’t sound like a lot, but that’s two inches on the V&V map, which is probably like 20 feet; I don’t remember exactly, but that seems about right. One can just imagine the cover of the comic book in which Professor Potato is engaging, say, the Fantastic Four, and is engaging Reed Richards in the Battle of the Extendable Limbs and avoiding getting roasted by The Human Torch while his Potato-Men minions are keeping The Thing (who kinda looks like he’s made out of tater tots, now that I think about it) and Sue Storm occupied. Not that Marvel would ever do something so ridicu—

Come at me with that (checks notes) glue gun.

Uhhh, never mind.

Incidentally, I did not remember the existence of Professor Potato when creating the infamous Dennis the Vizsla villain Darth Tater; in fact, Darth Tater was based on a photograph of an actual sweet potato that decided it was going to try growing in my parents’ pantry. If I remember correctly, they sent the picture with the express intention that I could do something with it on Dennis’s blog. They were, of course, correct.

I find your lack of ketchup disturbing.

8 thoughts on “The Early Years: Mmm, Potato

Leave a reply to sopantooth Cancel reply