The (Semi) Early Years: Jim Used To Be Bendy

From the “I Can’t Do That Anymore” Department:

If only my plots were this twisty.

One

This is a “Sorry I Haven’t Been Around Much” post … or rather, I have been around, but I haven’t been here. I’m still trying to get my next fantasy novel out before they forget about me over in the UK. Why, after spending over three years doing mostly funny Dennis stories instead of fiction, am I suddenly so motivated to finish my book? Because of this:

Continue reading “One”

Here’s Where The Story Ends

Most of the readers of this blog are probably aware of my other, much-more-popular-than-this-one blog, Dennis’s Diary of Destruction, which features the antics and adventures of three dogs, an evil cat, ninja hedgehogs, a sarcastic field mouse, a stoner ex-DEA drug-sniffing dog, and various other bit players. When I discovered that Dragon Stones had hit the best-seller list on the Amazon.co.uk Kindle store, I put Dennis’s blog on hiatus so I could concentrate on finishing my next fantasy novel (which is not a sequel to Dragon Stones — but, due to popular demand, such a sequel will be coming eventually). This decision produced much sadness amongst Dennis’s nice readers. Fortunately, one of them, Mango Relentlessly Huge, has most thoughtfully provided an ending to my book so that I can get back to Dennis’s Diary that much faster. So here, for your reading pleasure, is the final chapter of my next novel, as written by Mango the mastiff. Enjoy!

Continue reading “Here’s Where The Story Ends”

Scene of the Month: “Dragon Stones”. Again.

Well the votes are in, and the winner for the first scene of the month is (surprise!) Dragon Stones (which is holding at #2 on the Epic Fantasy chart over at Amazon.co.uk — thanks, UK readers!). This scene takes place the morning after T’Sian has cremated a man whom she inadvertently frightened to death, and involves various unpleasant odors. Or pleasant, depending on your point of view.

Continue reading “Scene of the Month: “Dragon Stones”. Again.”

But They Love Me In The U.K.

So last week I got a message from Amazon.co.uk that they were going to be depositing a royalty payment into my account. I wasn’t really aware that I had been making any sales in the UK, so I went to take a look at my Kindle e-book reports and was startled to find that I had sold hundreds of copies of Dragon Stones the week before. Then I visited the Dragon Stones product page, and was even more startled to see this:

Continue reading “But They Love Me In The U.K.”

Not So Random Rejection: Northern Frights

I’ve been hoping to pull this rejection out for a while, as it’s one of my favorites, but I haven’t. So I took matters into my own hands and went looking for it:

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Review: “Bubba Ho Tep”

So a couple weeks ago, while I was laid up with that kidney stone, I spent a lot of time watching movies and trying not to curl up into a fetal position. One of the movies I watched — re-watched, actually — was “Bubba Ho Tep”, an adaptation of a novella by Joe R. Lansdale (which I happen to own) starring Bruce Campbell as Elvis Presley and Ossie Davis as John F. Kennedy. Yes, THAT John F. Kennedy. Oh, and there’s also a soul-sucking mummy.

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Scenes-Of-The-Month: “The Wolf” and “Dragon Stones”

Well, the votes are in and we have another tie this month between The Wolf and Dragon Stones. It’s been a while since that happened, and it’s been so long since The Wolf last put in an appearance that I don’t remember where we left off. I think I said there were werewolf hijinx coming up, didn’t I? Let’s find out.

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No Post Today

Well I guess technically this is a post. But it’s not a very good one. Maybe I can interest you in voting for the next scene of the month instead?

Random Rejection: Maelstrom, “Pinch Bobby ‘Til He Bleeds”

It’s been a while since I reached into my stack of rejection letters, so today I dove in and pulled this one out, from Maelstrom, for a short story called “Pinch Bobby ‘Til He Bleeds”.

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