That Never Happened

So this week, as the school year drew to a close and my wife’s classroom prepared to shut down (forever, due to the school’s closure), she was looking for something to occupy the kids during their final days of attendance.  She thought she might show them a movie based on one of the books they read in her classroom every year:  Bridge to Terabithia.  But before showing it to the kids, she thought it would be a good idea to watch it here first, to make sure the filmmakers hadn’t screwed it up.  Because we all know what a bang-up job Hollywood always does on book adaptations, don’t we?

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There’s a reason you never see a movie poster that says “From the producers of ‘Bridge to Terabithia'”

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Not A Review Of “Orphan Black”

It’s probably not a surprise to anyone that I’ve been watching BBC’s “Orphan Black” since the first episode. “Orphan Black” is, of course, a show about a vast conspiracy to create, monitor, monetize, and sometimes terminate human clones, which is totally up my alley, right?

I see a mouse ... and horsies ... and a butterfly ... and Tatiana Maslany ... and Tatiana Maslany ... and Tatiana Maslany ... and ...
I see a sheep … and horsies … and a butterfly … and Tatiana Maslany … and Tatiana Maslany … and Tatiana Maslany … and …

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Teaser Tuesday 6/7/2016: “Unhappenings”

So this week I’m reading Unhappenings, by Edward Aubry.

unhappenings

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Teaser Tuesday 5/31/2016: “Grace Lost”

So this week I’m reading a zombie (shocker) apocalypse (shocker) novel called Grace Lost, by M. Lauryl Lewis, in which some sort of blue mist from space has coated the world and caused the dead to rise. Or something like that.

nightofthecomet
“Daddy would’ve gotten us Uzis.”

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Teaser Tuesday 5/24/2016: Not Quite “The End of the Story”

So this week I’m still reading The End of the Story, by Clark Ashton Smith.

Cover of "The End of the Story"
I know I left a scimitar around here somewhere …

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“Buffy the Vampire Slayer”: The Board Game

So it’ll certainly be no surprise to anyone who’s read more than, like, two sentences here that I was a fan of the “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” TV show. But I also, back in the day when I had more free time, was a fan of the “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” board game. What’s that? You ask, “There was a BtVS board game?” Well of course there was.

BtVSBoardGame

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Teaser Tuesday 5/10/2016: “The End of the Story”

So this week I’m reading The End of the Story, a collection of short works by Clark Ashton Smith, who was a writer in the vein of HP Lovecraft, albeit (so far) a little less eldritch in his abominations.

Cover of "The End of the Story"
Magic Jammies?

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Not A Review Of “Jurassic World”

So this week we’ve been watching “Jurassic World“, in which things get a little out of hand at the Wild Animal Park Safari Park Jurassic Park Jurassic World theme park, a lovely place which looks like someone put the Safari Park and Sea World together in a tumbler, shook it up, and poured the resulting slurry out into a Hawaiian valley.  The cause of the chaos this time is not a hurricane or corporate espionage, but rather, some overly ambitious genetic engineering combined with generally poor animal husbandry and a door that could maybe have been reinforced a little better. This all leads up to a designersaurus that’s much smarter and more versatile than it should be, which uses its mad skilz to escape its enclosure and go marauding.  Hilarity ensues.  And by “hilarity” I mean “lots of people getting eaten by dinosaurs”.

jurassic_world_gate
Abandon all hope, ye who enter here.*
*Does not apply to Chris Pratt or Bryce Dallas Howard

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Not A Review Of “Ant-Man”

So recently we watched “Ant-Man“, in which Jack Colton gives Phoebe’s boyfriend/(spoiler alert)husband Mike a suit that allows him to shrink down to the size of an insect, while Kate glowers disapprovingly.  Hilarity ensues.

tiny_ant_man
My eyes are up here.

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#FearTWD #BecauseTheyBuiltAn #AmusementPark On #CatalinaIsland

So apparently the Walking Dead have constructed an amusement park in Avalon on Catalina Island — excuse me, “Catrina Island” — in an attempt to draw in more victims. You may want to visit Two Harbors instead.

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Some of this stuff is really there.

Here’s what Avalon looks like from a similar angle when it’s not being overrun by the living dead and their ambitious waterfront redevelopment endeavors:

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Avalon apparently had a post-apocalyptic building boom.

And of course the panoramic view:

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From the air, we can sort of get an idea of where the “Catrina Island” ranger station was located:

Catalina_Aerial

As for staying on the island or leaving, I’d have gone with staying, at least until Lloyd’s of Avalon runs out of caramel apples.  After all, it’s the zombie apocalypse.  Once the caramel apples are gone, they’re gone for good.  Unlike, say, gasoline, of which there appears to be an unlimited supply.

caramel_apples
You like apples? How do you like THOSE apples?

By the way, did anyone else have a “look at the flowers” flashback in that final scene? Or was it just me?