It’s 1991 and my career as a milliner is over before it begins.

It’s the entire 1980s and am I a boy who likes to sit with dogs while reading, or a boy who likes to read while sitting with dogs?

… Yes.

Things haven’t changed all that much since then, either, other than what form the books take. Oh, and now there are cats involved, too.

It’s 1996 and I Can Probably Escape While the Zombie Ducks and Geese Are Finishing Off That Girl Over There

Braaaaaiiiiiins.

For context, I’ve been scanning old prints and negatives (a project I’ve been meaning to do for years, and was finally motivated to start for due to family reasons), and sometimes I find ones that lend themselves to captions. Usually these involve my wife, who you may remember from such “Not a Review” posts as “Not a Review of Game of Thrones” and “Not a Review of Battlestar Galactica”. I have been posting these on Facebook from time to time but it finally occurred to me that I could also post them here. After all, this is supposed to be a blog about words, right? And a picture is worth a thousand words? So all I need is forty or fifty pictures and bam! I’ve got a novella.

BTW, don’t worry about her. It turned out the zombie ducks and geese were vegetarians.

The elusive wife, some 30-odd years ago, in the blockbuster horror sequel 28 Ducks Later. See? She does exist!