Not A Review of “Battlestar Galactica”

So recently I mentioned that, after any number of other series were rejected, I decided we would start watching the 2003 reboot of “Battlestar Galactica”. Obviously this show could not possibly be as good as “Breaking Bad”, because what is? But it’s still pretty good. It tends to put my wife to sleep in 15-20 minutes or so, which is longer than most movies can keep Mr. Sandman at bay. But does she actually pay any attention to it when she’s awake? For a while I didn’t think so. She didn’t really seem to know or particularly care who anyone was, leading to conversations like this:

Wife: (sitting on couch looking at fish tank)
Me: “That’s Boomer. The reason she’s on Caprica and on Galactica at the same time is because she’s a Cylon.”
Wife: (continues looking at fish tank)

One week later:

Wife: (sitting on couch looking at fish tank)
Me: “That’s Boomer. The reason she doesn’t remember blowing up the water tank is because she’s a Cylon.”
Wife: (continues looking at fish tank)
Me: “That’s Starbuck. She’s the best fighter pilot in the fleet.”
Wife: (continues looking at fish tank)

One week later:

Wife: (sitting on couch looking at fish tank)
Me: “That’s Boomer. The reason she almost didn’t tell anyone she found water on that planet is because she’s a Cylon.”
Wife: (continues looking at fish tank)
Me: “That’s Starbuck. She can fly circles around Apollo.”
Wife: “Who’s Apollo?”
Me: “He’s Adama’s son.”
Wife: “Which one is Adama?”
Me: “He’s the commander of Galactica.”
Wife: “Oh.” (goes back to looking at fish tank)

One week later:

Wife: (sitting on couch looking at fish tank)
Me: “That’s Starbuck. She was in that Riddick movie.”
Wife: (suddenly interested) “Which Riddick movie?”
Me: “That last one, with the dog and the giant scorpions or whatever they were.”
Wife: (losing interest because it wasn’t the original Riddick movie, “Pitch Black”) “Oh.” (goes back to looking at fish tank)

Recently, though, we watched the first of a two-part episode in which, following a rather catastrophic mishap involving a communications drone, Galactica finds itself in need of about a dozen new pilots. Starbuck is out on a training run with a couple of these student drivers when eight Cylon Raiders arrive out of hyperspace. Hoping to avoid a massacre, Starbuck sends the trainees — including the aptly code-named “Hot Dog” — running back to Galactica while she takes on all the Cylon Raiders by herself in a deep space dogfight. Cylon Raiders seem to be faster, more maneuverable, and generally all-around superior to the old Colonial Vipers flown by the humans, so everyone thinks that Starbuck’s engaging eight of them by herself is tantamount to suicide. Hot Dog, disobeying orders, turns around to help Starbuck and manages to destroy one of the Cylons with a surprise attack before his Viper is disabled by return fire. Starbuck (who, as previously mentioned, is the best pilot in the fleet) takes out the other seven, but is shot down herself and ends up crash-landing on a nearby moon. End of part one.

Several days later, we watched part two of this episode. A conversation like this ensued:

Wife: (sitting on couch looking at fish tank)
Me: “That’s Starbuck. She got shot down while single-handedly destroying eight Cylon Raiders.”
Wife: “No she didn’t.”
Me: “What?”
Wife: “She only destroyed seven of them. ‘Hot Dog’ came back and destroyed one.”
Me: (stares at wife in slack-jawed astonishment)
Wife: “Yeah, that’s right.”

So is my wife paying any attention to “Battlestar Galactica”? Yes. Yes she is. She just doesn’t want me to know about it.

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3 Comments

  1. Pingback: Still Not A Review Of “Battlestar Galactica” | Scribblings

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