Well after the last couple of weeks of me being chatty about my checkered past in the horror field, this week we are back on more familiar ground, with a lovely random rejection letter from the Maria Carvainis Agency:
Yes, that’s right, this is a rejection letter from 1994. I told you I kept them all! I can’t identify from this letter what the project was, but from the date it was probably either Night Watchman or Long Before Dawn. Side note: Saying that a letter is “seemingly” impersonal doesn’t make it not impersonal. All it does is show that you know it’s impersonal and that you feel slightly guilty about it, at least, enough to add an adverb. But as the style guides always say, adverbs violate the “show don’t tell rule”. (Another side note: Let’s not start a flame war about the use of adverbs; I use them all the time. I’m just being snarky.)
The astute reader may have noticed that sometimes I blur out contact information on these letters and sometimes I don’t. If the contact information appears to be for a person’s home (often the case with letters from the small press) then I’ll blur it. If, as in this example, the letter is from a professional literary agency and the contact information is for their office, I’ll leave it in.
Viscosity 
Omg! Not only is this a crappy impersonal letter, but they had the nerve to highlight it which only makes it TACKY! Yuck!
Glad for you that it isn’t a recent letter, however. 🙂
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any particular reason WHY you kept them all???
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I kept all my story rejection letters until I had so many they just weren’t special anymore. I did get a New Yorker rejection online, and people say you should keep New Yorker rejections, but I found that out after I deleted it.
Agency rejections are just to painful to keep.
But you do make me wish I had a scanner.
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Ha! That *is* funny. And given my recent descent into rejection letter hell(this morning to be exact) it put a smile to my face. But at least someone was kind enough to sign the seemingly impersonal rejection. I got a rejection email the other day that wasn’t from a person. The email address was generic and it was signed: “Search Committee”. I don’t know who that is.
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You inspired me to finally open one last rejection letter, myself, from The Institution that Shall Not Be Named” which arrived a year or so ago. Somehow it fell behind something or other and I hadn’t ever opened it.
But, wow, wouldn’t it have been tragic if it turns out to have been something OTHER than a rejection letter? Like a check for a million dollars to compensate me for all the angst they’ve caused me? Which would soon expire if I didn’t open it?
Ha. No such luck! 🙂
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Mine is identical to yours… or nearly so… everything is the same, every word…. except for the date… mine has 2005
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This makes me shudder. It reminds of those awful days when I used to get rejection letters from TV producers. I’m so glad I left that behind.
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Trying to find Maria Carvainis, your rejection letter surfaced. Before I retired, I had the pleasure of working with authors. While I understand the pain of a rejection, if Ms. Carvainis’ letter came to you within a couple of months of your submission, I believe that telling you no is considerably better than not knowing the status of your submission.
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Oh, I agree. And after the first few dozen rejection letters, they just become an indicator that it’s time to put a check mark next to that submission and move on to the next one.
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I met Maria Carvainis years ago and she’s a good agent, and at the time, almost always wrote a personalized message, so this surprises me a bit. However, more and more agents are resorting to form letters when it comes to rejection. I stumbled on this sight after I decided to query her with another project… at least I’ll know what to expect. She doesn’t accept queries via email, and still likes the old methods of snail mail. In some ways that refreshing and at least that, seems like an old personal touch.
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Well, this was a long time ago (1994), so I wouldn’t use it as too much of a guide to what to expect today. But one never knows. 🙂 Best of luck with your project!
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I was Maria’s client for about seven months. She told me she thought my antagonist was “delicious,” and then held on to my ms. for months and months and months. Then, seven months later, I received a note out of the blue from her saying that my book was “disgusting.” Really, really odd woman. And highly unprofessional. A total waste of time. I would stay away if I were you.
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