From the “Doesn’t This Happen To Everyone?” Department:
From the “I’m Chevy Chase And You’re Not” Department:
So this week I reached into my pile of ancient elementary school paperwork and pulled out this one:
I’m not sure if this checklist considers “Tells On Other Children” to be a good thing or a bad thing. And “Participates Freely in Singing”? I find that hard to believe!
This week, we have a lovely piece of artwork from the archives:
I’m going to file this one under “sentences that you are unlikely to see on contemporary elementary school writing assignments”. I’m sure you can guess which sentence I mean.
These “early years” samples are not really writing-related, but they probably explain a lot about why I spend so much time on Dennis’s crazy adventures.
For school assignments, I always wrote a lot of what could charitably called “speculative fiction” (or, less charitably, “nonsense”). Here’s a very short example, most likely from elementary school, although it’s hard to tell because I didn’t bother to date it, or even to put my name on it:
So my parents like to find old examples of things I wrote when I was a kid and send them to me, just to remind me that I, too, was once a child. I thought it might be interesting to post one or two of them. With that in mind, I present my classic tale of horror and suspense, “The Great Beast Invasion”. If we assume that the date in the story is about when the story was written (which it probably is, given that kids are pretty much creatures of the “now” — just like dogs!), then I would’ve been six when I scribbled down this masterpiece.